Random Acts of Ordinary

“In order to arrive at being everything, desire to be nothing.” — John of the Cross

Do you ever take stock of your day and wonder whether or not you made a difference to anyone? Sometimes it can feel like nothing interesting happened. Or maybe it was that we weren’t paying attention.

This morning a sunrise followed me all the way to work. It started out brilliant cotton candy pink and developed into the most gorgeous cloudy sunrays. I realized that whether I was at home or in St. Paul, MN, I had the opportunity to enjoy this beauty. Sitting in traffic and marveling at the sunlight poring through the clouds in “God” rays, I wondered how many people in their cars next to me were experiencing this moment and how many missed it.

On Monday, I was standing in line at the grocery store. A man ahead of me had a bottle of water to purchase. I figured it would be a quick purchase, so I waited with my one item behind him. Instead, the purchase took about five minutes as the man tried unsuccessfully to use his food debit card. I thought I was being so righteous by smiling and waiting patiently. But maybe I missed an opportunity to simply offer to pay for his water!

Later I took my daughter to have some dinner at a local fast food restaurant. An older woman came in behind us and ordered her dinner. Then she proceeded to find a seat and eat alone. Again, did I miss an opportunity to invite her to join us?

Maybe this sounds over the top in terms of kindness or service. Or maybe we miss too many opportunities like these. Our busy lives feel full, but could they be fuller — richer — if we saw the truth and opportunity behind each encounter? Could we move past our fears of rejection and doubt and conflict and do the right things anyway?

So what if we look weird or the other person rejects our offer? The point is that we stepped out of our comfort zone and made an attempt at connection and plain old kindness.

Seeing an opportunity and acting on it takes practice. We have to ignore the tabloids in the checkout line, stop the running commentary in our heads with its lists and obligations and worries, open our eyes and observe what the heck is going on around us.

Life happens mostly in ordinary time. In the midst of our routine, mundane and run-of- the-mill moments, there is potential for the miraculous. If we’re too busy trying to be somebody, trying to fix something, avoid something or move ahead, we might miss out on being really useful.

Pay attention. Your life is happening right now. And somebody really needs you today.

Being Sure of What We Hope For

Wowie! My new website has finally launched! I am very excited to continue the practice of patient parenting and kindness through this blog and the resources at The Patient Parent.

Many thanks to Kristin Smith, a true graphic design star with Francis and Wool Studios. who lent her creativity to my new site and launched it into cyberspace.

I also thank the countless parents and children, friends and family, writers, editors, child care providers and teachers who have supported me over the last five years to bring the message of patience to a national audience. I feel very blessed to have the opportunity to share my writing, to encourage parents to read to their children with “Nat Knows Bananas,” and to actually live the message that I share.

Many thanks to my sister, Joy Hierlmaier, who provided illustrations for the “Nat Knows Bananas” book. You are always ENOUGH, beautiful woman.

It’s been a long road, and definitely worth the pain and delayed gratification!

Speaking of patience, I want to share one little story about my six-year-old. We were sitting at dinner on Saturday night: she and me and my 9-year-old, Nat, my sister Laura and her daughter, and my mother. Three generations of women — we had all been through a lot in the past four years and were celebrating a peaceful moment and long overdue reunion.

In front of us was a lovely meal of red potatoes and cucumbers from my garden, a fresh salad my sister whipped up, some surprisingly tasty tofu chicken nuggets (shh, don’t tell the kids) and warm bread. My heart filled with gratitude as I looked around the table.

Then my six-year-old piped up and said, “We need to pray.”

Her prayers are usually very creative and sometimes long, often a replay of the day’s activities. She thanked God for our time at the county fair and for the carnival rides and for winning at BINGO ($11 which she stuffed into her purse before quickly leaving the game!) and also for the good food.

Then after a short pause, she said, “And please help all the bad people to be good. Amen.”

It may be a long time before all the “bad” people are “good” in this world. But I believe that a child’s prayer for such a wonderful thing is heard loud and clear. However you define bad or good, I invite you to pray for goodness in everyone’s life. It might take years to see it, but NEVER give up hope.

Hebrews 11:1 God bless to all the patient parents out there...and let me know what you think of the new site! Pass it on!